Click the pic for more over at Mighty God King.

Now, really guys, what could you do with my books? I’d love to see my first book, Hates Air Travel or my second book, Teens Get Gold (and Laid).

Watch it before you decide what it’s really about.

Sorry, guys, but this is the angsty self-absorbed post that I threatened you all with a couple weeks ago. My unfunny ‘True Christian Conservatives’ post a few weeks back was perhaps a prequel to this one. I think I have to spit out the poison before I can move on to more enjoyable and interesting writings. Feel free to quit reading when you get bored.

Throughout my life, I’ve often thought that my attitudes and major concerns were on the fringe, only to discover, dismayingly, that I was in the middle of the bell curve. I don’t like feeling ‘normal’.

So I’m asking for a reality check from my fellow Brainiacs today, because for once, I’m hoping that I’m just insane, and could use some bucking up and advice about where to go from where I find myself.

All of us who post here have radically dropped off in participation since this past Spring. There are some obvious reasons. Many of us have been so busy with work that we’ve had little energy left to give to EOB. I know that I’ve also felt ‘written out’, needing to refill the well of interesting ideas.

But I’ve also been generally lethargic and withdrawn in a lot of areas of my life. I find it difficult to complete projects that require a lot of concentration and multiple steps. I don’t answer email. I deliberately withdraw and isolate, even more than usual. I have this odd sort of flattened depression much of the time, where I’m not so much overtly saddened as just blunted in my responses to everything. (This is all diagnosable in DSM-IV, incidentally.)

There are some personal life events that have contributed, but it’s this goddam election season that seems to be driving it.

The past eight years have been nearly unendurable, as we watched almost everything good and decent and functional in our country attacked and, largely, demolished. Lotsa depression and rage for all of us to share, I think. And now it feels like the norm.

But it looks like we’re about to see a tidal wave of electoral change happen (assuming that this series of elections doesn’t get stolen, too, of course…). Why am I not happy?

Even if Obama wins with 350+ electoral votes, even if we get another 30+ congressscritters, even if we elect a filibuster-proof 60 Senators, I’m disheartened.

And, no, it’s not about knowing that Obama won’t be the new messiah, or knowing that we’ll still be governed largely by corruptible self-serving sociopaths. Since my stereotypical radicalization in the idealized Sixties, I’ve been clear that anyone who strives for huge amounts of power and/or money is broken and dangerous, so that’s not a problem for me.

It’s taken me a while to sort through the wreckage that is my mental process, but I think I’ve identified the central issue.

It’s not really about the politics per se.

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Props to Erica-Liis for bringing this to my attention.

Apropos my post the other day about the historical familial connections between slaves and slave owners, here is a profile in the Wall Street Journal of the McCains: descendants of the slaves McCain’s ancestors owned. Serendipity doo-dah. Via Suburban Guerrilla.

After his presidency is over, I think Obama’s got a real career ahead of him. The man’s got great timing.

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I’ve moved my blog from digitalnoir.com/steve to eatourbrains.com/steve. Going to the old one will redirect. I haven’t recreated the old stuff yet (db crash) but at least I’ll blog regularly both here and there.

It’s like I was dead, but now I’m, uh, not necessarily alive–just, say, undead.

I want to confess something I’ve never told anyone before.

Occasionally I meet someone with my surname, and when that happens, we often wonder together whether we are relatives–whether somewhere in the past we share a common ancestor. We compare notes about our families. Are we related?

Here’s the confession part: I am white, and have never met a black person with my own surname. And I have always had low-grade anxiety over what I would do if I did. Because slaves often ended up with the same surnames as their owners. And I have ancestors in the south, so it seems likely that there are descendants out there of slaves that my ancestors owned.

What could I say to this person? Certainly not: let’s compare family histories and see if my great-great-grandpa owned yours. In short, I am ashamed of my slave-owning roots. (And no, I’m not certain I have a slave-owning ancestor. But it seems likely, knowing what I know of my family’s history on that side: where they lived [Virginia starting in the 1700s] and what they did for a living [farming]).

This is something that has percolated in the back of my mind for years. But I’ve never said anything to anyone about it. It’s been my dirty little secret.

So, I had a conversation with my mother this weekend. My niece is about to wed, and folks are coming into town for the wedding, and family stories often surface around these kinds of events. My mother mentioned that I had an ancestor, a great-great-grandmother in Michigan, whose husband fought and died in the Civil War. It turns out this ancestor of mine was a member of the Underground Railroad, and had a home with a secret underground room. She helped runaway slaves cross over into Canada.

As my mother told me this, I felt relief. Yes, I almost certainly have some truly oppressive assholes for ancestors. But I am thankful that I also have one who had the moral courage and good judgment to be on the side of the angels.

So, in commemoration of those who–

• Lived and died in bondage (we recall your suffering and grieve for your hurts at the hands of your oppressors);
• Had the chance, and took their courage in their hands to flee (we rejoice that you found your freedom); and
• Participated in the Underground Railroad, and aided escaping slaves (we honor your willingness to do what was right).

–here is a multi-media site with maps, information, photos, and recordings about the Underground Railroad. Celebrate freedom. Click the pic and enjoy the ride! (And PS, Thanks, G’G'Gramma, for giving me something I can be proud of, from an ugly time in our nation’s past.)

My buddy Linda (frequent commenter lda) sent this to me. It is reassuring that in a world where the candidate to nowhere gets preferential press for just winking, we can come home and, over and over again, rip the limbs from a beloved toy.

Click the pic to go to the product page at ThinkGeek.  Watch the video.

To My Fellow True Christian Conservatives,

I’m writing to you today to warn you of a great threat to our American values and way of life. You may know that this country will soon hold elections to determine the Presidency and Vice-Presidency of the United States of America.

We all understand that the Democrat Party is Satan’s tool and that Hussein Obama is a Muslim. Therefore, they are to be shunned.

Recent polls indicate that 40% of you plan to vote for John McCain and Sarah Palin, and that 10% of you are undecided.

These poll numbers show that many True Christian Conservatives have been deceived by what is known as ‘spin’.  You know the facts, but clever re-interpretations of their meanings have caused you to be unable to accurately evaluate their implications.

As your Spiritual Leader, it is my duty to inform you of the Truth, as disturbing as that Truth may be.

THE TRUTH ABOUT JOHN MCCAIN:

We have all along suspected that John McCain isn’t a True Christian Conservative. None of us knows what church he actually attends or who his Spiritual Leader is, if any. We do know these things:

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