Fast Zombie Blues

A few months ago, She Who Is Awesome forced me to watch ‘Walk the Line’ one night in exchange for being allowed to crash at her place.

I liked it a lot. And it got me to thinking….

If you’re my True Friend, you’ll click on the pic and view Johnny and Kris tearing it up in an excellent live performance of ‘Folsom Prison Blues’. If you don’t do this first, you may not realize just how relentlessly, mind-bogglingly, self-aggrandizingly clever are the lyrics that I’ve written.


Then: Fast Zombie Blues


EDIT: I’ve gotten some really good critique from the maniacs at KVR and done a remix of this song. Mostly just some balancing of track levels, changing some reverb, EQ’ing a bit, and a few other tweaks. Not a done deal yet; I think I still need to sort out the bass line more. But I think this mix sounds a lot more polished and am quite pleased with it.

Fast Zombie Blues Remix


I played it live at the recent Samhain gathering outside Dripping Springs, and John realized, as I hadn’t, that this is actually a teaching song. This is the sort of wisdom that needs to be passed on by the tribal elders around the campfire, so that the young ones who’ve never experienced an infestation will have a framework that gives them a better chance of survival.


I’ve spent the entire weekend recording and mixing my magnum opus, and my ears and brain are fried. I have no perspective on it any more. I’ve tried it on two speaker systems and through headphones, but mixes sometimes translate poorly. And I think it’s a little slow. I may revisit it and speed it up some.

I welcome comments on the mix and other relevant items.


EDIT: Okay, so I’m a little obsessive. I bumped the speed on the song from 95 bpm to 105 bpm, and replaced the original in my link above with the new Fast Zombie version. Fortunately, Reaper, which is my recording software and is the best goddam software in the galaxy, uses Elastique Pro, the very best pitch and time-stretching algorithm on the market. I can’t hear any artifacts in the new version.

It’s a real toe-tapper now.


357 Miles Per Hour

Okay, last April I traveled to L.A. on Amtrak’s Southwest Chief, an experience that was delightful, but still took from about four in the afternoon to eight thirty the following morning. The distance is 775 miles or so and that gives us an average speed of 47 miles an hour (or so.)

Last April, in France, they broke their own World Record for trains. Let me put it this way: if we had their tracks and their trains I could’ve done it in a little over 2 hours and 10 minutes.

(found at Making Light. They got the pointer from Charlie Stross)

By the way, there have been faster trains (both MagLev and Rocket) but this had loads of passengers aboard.

Making a List, Checking It Twice…

Yeah, yeah, I know, I missed my post for last week and I’m late this week.  And I’m so freaking lazy that I’m stealing my blog idea for this week from The Dude.

Yes, I am THAT lame.

(In my defense, I have a very good reason for last week’s crapping out. And as for this week, it’s early Thanksgiving — at my house.)

The Dude is an inveterate list maker.  He makes lists of his favorite books, movies, and actresses he’s got a crush on who were born no later than 1910.  I make lists that involve groceries, errands, and bill paying.

Obviously, his lists are more fun.

So, I’m embracing my inner Dude and going to leave you with a couple of lists of my own — though the items on said lists are not in order of preference or importance.

Things not to say to your wife/girlfriend:

1. What did you do to your hair?
2. Actually, that does make you look fat.
3. I think you’re overreacting.
4. Yes, “X” is prettier than you.
5. The house looks fine.  My mother won’t notice if the place isn’t clean.
6. Is it right before your period?
7. Did you lose weight?
8. Did you gain weight?
9. Oh my God, Edyta Sliwinska has a smoking hot bod.  (Which is true, but must it be commented on every time she appears on TV?)

10. Are you sure you’re not on your period?

Things not to say when you’re in a band:

1. This is my girlfriend, Yoko.
2. You’ve been playing it in E? I thought we were playing it in F# minor.
3. Let’s make “Cocaine” our ten-minute jam song. (In all fairness, only the bass player will want to kill you.)
4. I think you’re turned up too loud.
5. You’re not turned up enough.
6. You know what would really make our sound?  An accordion.
7. Well, she’s not a good singer, but she’s HOT!
8. I think we should go for a combination of Led Zeppelin and Maurice Chevalier.
9. Let’s cover “My Heart Will Go On.”
10. This is my girlfriend, Yoko.

The Short List:

The “Go To” books when I need something wonderful to read:

Brittle Innings by Michael Bishop
Queen’s Gambit by Walter Tevis
Geek Love by Katherine Dunne